Childhood & Relational Trauma Therapy in California
Understanding Childhood & Relational Trauma
Trauma is what happens when distressing experiences change your internal sense of safety. That shift changes how you think, how your body senses threat, and how you act in daily life.
As your trauma therapist, I focus primarily on developmental trauma. We look closely at how childhood trauma in adults makes it hard to trust others, form deep connections, or feel grounded in yourself.
I also work with relational trauma, or the harm that occurs when trust breaks down in close relationships. Together, these experiences can leave you stuck people-pleasing, fearing abandonment, struggling to trust others, or ignoring your own needs to keep the peace.
How It Shows Up
In the Mind: Feeling constantly responsible for managing everyone else's mood, assuming one mistake will lead to rejection, or believing you have to earn love through caretaking and performance.
In the Body: A tight chest during mild disagreements, a knot in your stomach when a family member calls, or feeling a physical urge to over-explain yourself when stress rises.
In Your Actions: Impulsively saying "yes" to family or partner demands out of obligation, overworking to maintain a sense of control, or retreating into work or phones when emotional stress hits.
In Relationships: Swallowing your true feelings to avoid rocking the boat, carrying intense guilt whenever you set a basic boundary, or staying stuck in caretaking roles to keep the peace.
Why Family Dynamics and Cultural Context Matter
Cultural expectations can teach you to brush off your own pain with thoughts like "everyone deals with this" or "my parents sacrificed so much, who am I to complain?"
Ignoring your needs and managing everyone else's stress weren't personal flaws. They were well intentioned ways you kept the peace and protected yourself growing up. But family and culture aren't just sources of pressure—they also hold deep connection, strength, and pride. Trauma therapy helps you explore that balance, so you can find a new way forward.
How We'll Work Together
Unhooking from Protective Habits: Notice automatic reactions like shutting down or over-explaining so you can learn how to stop people pleasing, slow down, and choose intentional, grounded responses.
Setting Boundaries Without Guilt: Work through the discomfort of setting limits and putting your needs first, helping you communicate clearly without feeling like you're blowing up your relationships.
Building Real Connection: Translate attachment patterns into practical shifts in your daily interactions, moving away from defensive survival and toward actual trust, respect, and safety.
Frequently Asked Questions
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It is 1:1 online trauma therapy focused on your current, day-to-day interactions. We look at habits like people-pleasing, hiding how you really feel, or pulling away, and focus on practical ways to set boundaries and communicate clearly.
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If you find yourself constantly holding back your thoughts, dreading conflict, checking out emotionally, or feeling like you have to sacrifice your own needs to keep the peace, you are experiencing relational stress. You don't need a single catastrophic event to benefit from this work.
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Yes. I am in-network with Aetna, Anthem, and Blue Shield of CA, and provide superbills for out-of-network reimbursement
Stop Carrying Relational Stress Alone
If you’re ready to break survival patterns and show up fully in your life, let’s talk. We’ll use 15 minutes to see if we’re a good fit.